I have been contemplating on whether to write about this or not because the culprits themselves might come across it but WTH, I am enraged. Take this as an etiquette 101.
When the news spread that my dad was to undergo heart surgery, many people called and voiced their concerns. Now, we really appreciated all the kind gestures but there are a few who over-did it and are in borderline of being rude.
The opportunist.
The type who seemed to care a great deal but actually wanted to take the opportunity to pursue their private agenda. He/she had made many calls prior to the op and came to visit first thing after the surgery. In the beginning, we were touched by his/her kind gesture and thought it was out of pure concern. I think not. Well, maybe part of it was, but it was mostly to create an opportunity/excuse to sell his/her products.
Right after my father was transferred out of intensive care, he/she came without any prior notice. Armed with plenty of pamphlets, he/she started on a rambling sales pitch. There was total disregard of the weak patient who had just undergone a major surgery and could hardly speak. My mum and I kept hinting him/her to stop but what did he/she do? He/she lent a deaf ear and continued with the seemingly endless long speech of how great the product is.
Now, I have nothing against direct-sales people, but there’s a time and place for everything. Trying to do a sales pitch in that situation is definitely NOT it. You don’t see me selling baby products on your wedding day, do you?!
As if that’s not enough, he/she made what seemed like a gazillions calls during the following weeks, wanting to come again. My mum actually was being quite frank and told him/her it’s not convenient for him/her to visit as we were all quite tired and some of us were coming down with flu. But still, he/she asked where we were staying and insisted on coming. I don’t know about you, but this is totally inconsiderate and highly unacceptable in my book. That wasn’t the end of it either. After we were back home, he/she called my mum once again, trying to pitch a sale. This time, he/she accused my mum of not wanting to listen when my mum told him/her that she would be in contact if she was interested. Aiyo, you said la, where got people like that one?!
An advise for you, when you keep blabbing on your sale pitch and people only answer with ‘erm, ahuh, ic…etc’, take it as a cue to stop and run with the wind! They are simply not interested. Don’t keep coming back for the shoot-down. It will only make people agitated and have a bad impression of you and your hard-selling tactics. I simply have zero tolerance for a behaviour like that. BAH!
The me-me-me type.
The this the type who gets angry if we don’t follow what they want. They only cared about their own needs and whether they were the first ones who knew about any news. They got angry when the patient told them he was too tired for visitors and had kindly rejected their visits. A phone conversation between me and the said culprit went as followed:
Me: Hello Aunt-so-and-so, I am calling to tell you that the surgery is a success and my father is doing very well now.
MMM: Oh, have you called other people about this? Who else knows about this?
You know I called your dad weeks before the surgery and wanted to visit him, but he rejected my request, said that he would like to rest and would not at home at that time. Why like that one? Why didn’t he want to let me visit?
Me: Well, we went away because he needed to rest and didn’t want anyone to disturb him lo.
MMM(still didn’t get the hint and continued to blame us for not letting her visit): AIyo, I wanted to come and discuss about it with him ma. Why like that one?!
Me: …..
Finally, a kind reminder:
Always call before visiting someone, this goes without saying. It is quite rude to go and visit someone without giving them notice. This is a considered an invasion of privacy. People may have had prior engagements or may be too busy to entertain you. Be a little considerate. Plus it saves you the trouble of going all the way to people’s home and finding out that they are not in. So it really plays out well for everyone.
The other thing is, when you are visiting, always bear in mind that the patient needs his rest, and his lunch! Don’t over-stay your welcome or come during lunch hour! I can’t keep count on how many people who chose to visit during meal times and sit until the cows came home. The patient has been starved in many occasions. ;(
p/s: If you are offended by this post, then you probably is the culprit. Yes you! It’s time to do a self-revision of your manners!. GRRRR…
